Submitted by giomadusa
Ma’am,you’re only allowed two guests at a time, not your brother’s best friend, your cousin’s girlfriend, your tax man, your long lost friend you’ve been trying to be friends with again, that guy who does your tailoring named Guy and that random person you met off the street who suddenly felt like swimming, all at the same time! No way.
Submitted by rockininred
I did this by accident the other day when I was at a water park. My sisters told me that if I had any more lifeguard outbursts, they would make me sit in the car for the rest of the day.
Submitted by Jen
I had a friend who told me that they were so strict about the up and down scanning pattern that if your head wasn’t visibly moving, you were written up! Every place is different and every person is different. So I always tell new guards to pick a scanning pattern that they are comfortable with, that covers every part of the pool in 10 seconds (10/20 rule), and that shows your head guard that you are watching your water.
Submitted by destiny504
Hey dummy. A water slide is a ride just like a roller coaster is a ride. And, we have to have a special license just to operate this ride. The height limit is determined by the manufacturer and the department of the county that gives out the license. I didn’t just make up a random number because I didn’t like the way your two year old looked at me. Oh you didn’t know that? Well then, your ignorant self is probably in no position to argue with me, huh?
Submitted by therealharuhifujioka :
"I lifeguard at a country club where the people rather spend money on fine jewelry and nice cars than swimming lessens. There’s this one dad who brings his son fully aware that he can’t swim and always watches me to make sure that I’m watching his kid. He’s always anxious and paranoid that his kid’s going to drown or something.
Yes, I’m certified lifeguard. Yes, I will jump in to save your child if he/she is in trouble. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t bother having your kid learn how to swim. The only way he’ll learn is if someone takes the time AND effort to teach him. Not by letting him jump in the water and trying to doggy-paddle back to the edge.”
One time, I had a mom who was standing on the side of the pool while her daughter, about 7 feet away from her, began to drown. I blew my whistle, pointed and began to run, but figured I wouldn’t get far since I was 35 feet away from her while her mom was 7. But nope! That mom, fully aware that her child was drowning, let crucial seconds pass as I made my way through the water to her child instead of getting her designer tennis shoes and precious pants wet to rescue her own daughter. Moral of the story: some parents are idiots.
Submitted by vulcanswithattitude
Guilty. But when you have to keep the whistle in your mouth and use it constantly because you have a group of pre-teen boys come in and try to start a fight club in the pool, what else are you supposed to do?
Submitted by blow-away-soon
This is the worst for me to deal with! Especially as a supervisor, standing there watching someone disregard their water because their fox 40 is so much more interesting than the water, while a group of unattended children play a game I like to call “Watch how fast I can drown my little brother,” makes me so upset. So, guess who’s getting the doll thrown in on them. :D
Submitted by Mountain Writer
Heyyyy, so uh, going down the slide huh? Yeaaaa… it should be funnn… sooo umm, before you go, your life is going to get exciting in a couple months huh? Oh, nothing’s happening in your life in a couple months? Uhhh, maybe three months? Nothing? You sure? Have you seen your doctor lately? Uhh, no reason, never mind… enjoy the slide…..
Submitted by callmeekat
Little child, can’t you drown near the other lifeguards for a change?!
I’m a deck supervisor at the pool I’ve been working at for 2 1/2 years and occasionally have the opportunity to read comments members and guests have written on the comment cards scattered around the place. This Saturday in a rare moment of down time I stumbled upon the best comment ever sitting on my boss’ desk in the aquatics office. I didn’t think to copy it down verbatim but here is the comment to the best of my memory:
First I would like to say that the lifeguards are excellent, but I have yet to see a weekend afternoon where they are not overburdened by hoards of off the wall children and the self-important parents who think they don’t need to follow the rules and obstruct the lifeguards making their jobs even harder. I know that parties are a great way to enjoy the facilities, but the consequences for not following the rules should fall on the parents who seem to use the pool as a babysitting service. The lifeguards deserve a thank you, a raise, and a bonus for putting up with some of these families.
Dear commenter, these are my thoughts exactly. Can I get you a hug and possibly delicious treats?
I haven’t had any real rescues. We’ve had some pretty intense spinal audits though that I was completely convinced were real, until I saw all the managers of the whole building standing in a tiny window on the second floor that overlooks the pool. Other facilities in the area by the same company as mine have had to do rescues though, even a couple spinals. It’s scary to think of.
I agree that rescues are not difficult once you know what to do. However, I think that it can take a little while to learn all the types of rescues, especially if you are already nervous and new. Plus, each person, whether they are primary, secondary, tertiary, etc., has different tasks to do in a rescue. It’s a lot! But it can be done and since it is a part of your job, it’s important not to neglect learning these important skills. Being a new lifeguard and failing at first with audits is a part of learning, I failed my first one. But, I made sure that I talked to my head guards at the time, got some practice sessions in and did great on my second. You just have to take the initiative and learn. :)
I can’t give you a great answer because at my facility we aren’t allowed to hang in the office on our down time, we have to clean -.- Other places my friends have worked at have been more lenient with that, but not my facility. So, to avoid having to clean, we would do practice scenarios in the pool but add a twist. So we would do a spinal with all the rescuers blindfolded (that way we could work on our communication). It was hilarious. Or we’d do a rapid extraction without anyone being allowed to talk (that helped us to work on knowing exactly what each person, primary, secondary, etc., was supposed to do). Maybe someone else has some suggestions for what to do during down time?
Labor day weekend is only around two weeks away! Where has the summer gone?!?! I wanted to say sorry to you all for not keeping this blog as active as it can be. Summer has been crazy and super busy for me! I’m going to get to all the submissions and questions that I haven’t had a chance to address and don’t feel shy about submitting any new problems or situations you face when guarding. I promise you’ll get a response and be heard!!
there are 2 songs that have 100 beats per minute which is the correct amount for cpr and they are “staying alive” and “another one bites the dust” and if u don’t think that’s the rawest shit you’ve ever heard you can unfollow me right now.
Aw, thanks so much! <3 This comment really just made my night, no lie.
And, hey, if your guards need to vent a little, tell them to submit things! I’ve finally got some time off and will be queuing things up to go. I know we’d love to have see them. :)